Independence.

This week, I was reminded of how incredible it is that a woman as young as I am would be able to go to South Africa all on her own.

I chatted online with Sahar on Wednesday, who is a friend I made when I went to the Arabian Peninsula this past Spring Break. Every change in my life has seemed incredible to her: moving away from home to go to college, living with another family to intern at GCC, and now (potentially) getting a job on the other side of the world. Every time I talk to her, I know that my news completely blows her out of the water.

But then I talk to my friends here, and even they can't believe that I'm adventuring so independently. An old friend, Nareen, came over when I went home this weekend. She told me and my mom that she wants to go to Alaska, but that she is finding it difficult to get her parents to "let go." When my mom said excitedly, "Well have you heard about Sarah going to South Africa?" Nareen was completely shocked.

I am so blessed! God gave me a pastor who would say "go," a heart that would say "ok!!!" and parents who would say "yes." Everything about this has fallen into my lap. What a cool God I serve!

Pray for:

-A team of people who will support me in prayer for my trip this September.

-People in the congregation who will give rides to the Westmont students on Sunday mornings.

Hope

...And now, some light reading from Mark Mathabane's Kaffir Boy:

The ceiling of our shack began to crumble, and the door and wooden window frames began to rot, and in the winter icy winds would whip through. We were reliving the nightmare of Fifteenth Avenue. The slushed walls gradually peeled, inviting bats, rats and other nightly creatures to come live with us.

One day I asked my mother, "Why don't Papa fix the house?"

"It's not his house."

"Whose house is it?" I asked. "We live in it don't we?" Though I knew that we did not own the house, I thought that the least my father could do was to fix it; after all, we lived in it.

"Living in it doesn't make it our house."

"Whose house is it then?"

"It's the landlord's house."

"Why don't he fix it?"

"He doesn't want to."

"We pay him rent, don't we? He should fix it. If it falls, he won't be able to get rent no more."

"Yes, but he won't fix it."

"Why not?"

"HE WON'T FIX IT! NOW HUSH!"

I hushed, and the house continued decaying. Often during the night, particularly after it had rained and the floor was soggy wet, my brother, sisters and I, after being gnawed by vicious red ants and scorpions burrowing through the porous cement floor, would wake up screaming from the floor where we slept. Rats never stopped eating our palms and feet, and we often were unable to walk or handle anything for days because both areas were like open wounds. Bedbugs and lice sucked us dry during the night. And just about every day my mother had to get new cardboard to make pallets because the rats were eating those too.

What strikes me most about this novel is that the author doesn't seem to be as bothered by his standard of living as I am. I cringe at the thought of rats eating people in their sleep, but Mathabane capitalizes his mother's words, "NOW HUSH." He is most troubled by the overwhelming absence of hope.

That's why holistic ministry makes sense to me. People in Philippi (the township where Bridges started) have to continuously battle to protect the hope in their lives from a society that has a long history of taking it away. If a ministry can catalyst them into tangibly regaining hope, then the gospel will be nearby. 

"Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life."

-King Solomon

Pray for:

-Hope to penetrate South Africa, tangibly and spiritually.

-My continued hope in the Lord. Psalm 146:5-6. God is so good!

As I float on.

With my trip being exactly one month away, you would think that I'd have a grand sense of anticipation, excitement, or worry. You would also be wrong. I've been doing my research on South Africa apartheid, I've been calculating trip costs, and I've been explaining my hopes and plans to just about everyone. Fortunately, I am no longer anxious. Unfortunately, it's been difficult to feel anything.

The view from where I stand looks a lot like this. My small, plunky engine putters towards the infinity of God resting on the horizon. My cheeks are happily flushed from the cold, but my nose is numb and runny. Steering is easy. Waiting is not. Mostly, there is silence.

As I hesitantly float on and on, I will continue to hope in Paul's promise that "God will meet all your needs according to the glorious riches in Christ Jesus," and I will try my best to give of myself for His glory.

Pray for:

-People in the congregation to step up and serve the college students this fall.

-A deeper comprehension of my value in Christ. Colossians 2:9-10.

Thankfully...

I am anxious for the College Dinner this Monday, which still doesn't have a host or a plan. I am anxious for the students that will be flooding back into Westmont as early as next week, when I feel so inadequately prepared to welcome and challenge them. I am anxious for someone to lead the college group while I'm in South Africa, especially to welcome back the UCSB students. I am anxious to be healed from the loneliness that has inevitably been in my life since college ended. I am anxious for my trip to South Africa, for the questions it will answer about my future. Thankfully...

"No matter how the wind may blow, it cannot shake the sun."

-JJ Heller

"If I rise on the wings of the dawn,

if I settle on the far side of the sea,

even there your hand will guide me,

your right hand will hold me fast."

-King David

Pray for:

-Trust in God.

-"The peace of God, which transcends all understanding," to guard my heart and my mind in Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:7).

The adventure begins.

I bought a round-trip plane ticket to Cape Town, South Africa on Thursday. The total travel time is over 24 hours long. There are four stops, with a 1-hour layover in Dakar Yoff, Senegal, where (according to Dennis) I will stand in the airplane isle holding my luggage while they check the plane and add/subtract passengers. Talk about intense!

Trip dates:

September 13 - October 2

Buying the ticket means that it's REAL. I was hit by that reality so hard that I had to close my eyes when clicking the "submit" button on Orbitz. There's no turning back. I am going to South Africa. Period.

Pray for:

-A good finish to my internship at GCC

-God to prepare my heart in the next month